📄 Article
✓ Link checked
Free
Intermediate
Why we picked it
This is the guide for the check-in itself: what to actually say when you sit down. Perel names the three things co-founder fights are secretly about (power, closeness, recognition) so you stop arguing about the surface and address the real thing directly. Her concrete rules (keep an argument under 10 seconds then pause, swap 'always/never' for 'in this moment it feels like', address one problem at a time, never assassinate character) are exactly the disagreement-muscle drills you run when stakes are low so they hold when stakes are high.
From
First Round Review
by Esther Perel (via First Round Review)
20 min read
- Most co-founder fights are misdiagnosed: they are about power, recognition, or feeling sidelined, not the strategy you are nominally arguing over, so say 'I feel sidelined' instead of blaming.
- Fight cleanly with mechanical rules: one issue at a time, arguments capped at ten seconds before a pause, no 'always/never', acknowledge and validate before you rebut.
- Proactive maintenance beats crisis repair; keep a running list of what you appreciate in your co-founder and consider a coach as a neutral third party for accountability.
Open
review.firstround.com →
📄 Article
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Free
Intermediate
Why we picked it
Three founders describe, in their own words, exactly how they handled investors through a pivot, and the contrast is the lesson. Jasper's Rogenmoser went heads-down and let traction do the talking before he updated anyone. Fuse's Klaric ran an 'open kimono', showing investors his full thought process so the direction change read as judgment, not flailing. It is the founder-side counterpart to coming with conviction: you earn confidence by showing the reasoning and the early proof, not by asking permission.
From
Mercury blog
by Mercury (Meghan Gunn), featuring Dave Rogenmoser (Jasper), Andres Klaric (Fuse), Hillary Lin (Curio)
12 min read
- Reconstructing the company narrative is the hardest part of a pivot, so walk investors through the logic, not just the new plan
- Transparency about your thought process ('open kimono') preserves trust better than a polished announcement that hides the struggle
- Early traction on the new bet is the strongest possible investor update, so consider what the next stretch proves before you over-explain
Open
mercury.com →
📄 Article
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Freemium
Intermediate
Why we picked it
When a strategy fight has calcified into a standoff, this walks through the mechanics of getting unstuck: name what each of you actually needs, separate that from what is best for the company, and bring in structured help when direct conversation stalls. It is the practical companion to Perel: less about the feelings underneath, more about the process to run when you cannot agree on what would even settle the question.
From
Lenny's Newsletter
by Lenny Rachitsky (with Matt Mochary)
~15 min read
- Answer three questions at once (what I need, what you need, what the company needs) instead of defending a single position
- A hardened direction disagreement is a signal to change the process, not to keep repeating the argument
- Structured outside help is the move once founders can no longer resolve a core decision between themselves
Open
lennysnewsletter.com →